Glass case of emotion full#
Glass case of emotion crack#

No dreams had yet been crushed, but disappointment was mounting for some. The Dota 2 world was upside down as Team Empire’s base crumbled and the group stage for the biggest eSports tournament in the world came to an end. It was July 30th at the Westin Hotel in Seattle. Here is a look behind the closed doors of a practice room at The International, a glimpse into the private dining table conversations, a peek into the minds of the five men that were set out to make history, defy the odds and become the underdog story.ĭowntown Seattle, home The International Dota 2 Championships I had the opportunity to sit in their practice room for three weeks, where I could talk to them privately, observe the team dynamic, and witness meltdowns, arguments and raw emotion. Whatever it is that drives these chosen few, they are all united in their struggles, but separated in the defining moment in which the trophy is raised.įrom the signing and announcements, to roster troubles, even to the curtain of Key Arena, I have had the privilege of going along for the ride throughout compLexity Gaming’s Dota 2 journey. Some fight for themselves, for recognition and glory, while others fight for their families, to make them proud and secure a better future. Very few eSports athletes have such luxuries. He knows where his next meal is coming from and when he can pay rent. An accountant might not have the thrill, but he has security. A highly demanding and time-consuming job in which the big payout is exceedingly rare.

Glass case of emotion full#

The enviable illusion of “I play video games for a living” is a goal for so many, but once the goal is realized it’s a long, tough grind full of obstacles. More tears are shed due to a heart-wrenching loss than a career-defining victory. Hopefuls risk their livelihoods only to watch their fates slip away. The Truth: Over the course of a Dota 2 season, hundreds of dreams are shattered. What actually happens on the other side of the highly-produced stream, the rock star-like treatment at The International and the glorious picture of five young men holding a 6.8 million-dollar check. Few see the reality of what goes on behind closed doors.

For a majority of the community, the life that these individuals lead is almost like the golden road, a guaranteed ticket to a better life. What the public sees is not always the full story. In eSports and Dota 2, this is everyday life.

Glass case of emotion crack#

Many average citizens would crack under the pressure, falter with that weight on their shoulders. They perform under immense pressure with two goals in mind: provide for themselves and their families and become the best there has ever been. Ten stars on the stage giving it their all. Or maybe it’s the adventure that puts a spotlight on it everything.īut after it all, as I sit here on a rainy day in Krabi, there’s the holy-shit-I-can’t-believe-I’m-doing-this feeling, which will never get old.Flashing lights. Maybe it’s because I’m not working and there’s plenty of time to think about the emotions that I put aside when I once claimed to be too busy with work to think about them.

The feeling of accomplishment and newfound wisdom when I finish a museum or tour, because I’m now the smartest, most cultured person around - DUH. The puffed up sense of pride I feel when I jump into a body of water that I know has things like crocodiles and snakes in it, but I do it anyway (and then eat them at a food market later). The anxiety when a monkey growls at me, so I call the camp’s chihuahua named Susie to chase it away. The jolt of surprise when I take a shower in Krabi and rinse out my shampoo only to see two geckos on the shower stall staring at me. Then there are they day-to-day emotions that make me laugh when I reflect on them. There’s the loneliness that comes when I wish one of my best friends was at my side to enjoy the moment with me, instead of a person who I’ll never see again. There’s the exhaustion from absorbing so many new sights and smells and cultures. There’s the fear and worry of the unknown as I travel, not knowing what the next few hours or days will hope and hoping I’m able to be brave enough to handle it. There’s the sadness and regret that I’m missing important things at home, like my growing family and my best friends. There’s the overwhelming joy and pit of gratitude that has settled permanently in my stomach, knowing I’m able to take this trip that so many people only hope for. But there’s something about being away from comfort zones and knowing that I’m on this epic trip that make me more hyper aware of my emotions. Just as it would be at home, depending on the day, the answer is a mixed bag. So many people have asked how I’m feeling on this trip.